about absolutely nothing.

she has a point.

alysonmance — Fri, 08 Apr 2011 21:37:42 +0000

54 bags of heroin

alysonmance — Sat, 19 Mar 2011 15:42:29 +0000

did that get your attention? they were in a woman’s vagina.

….along with 31 empty bags, 8 prescription pills, $51.22 in cash and change, and a partridge in a pear tree.

http://nymag.com/daily/intel/2011/03/womans_remarkable_vagina_hid_5.html?imw=Y&f=most-viewed-24h5

[thanks steve]

“this is what happens when i hear this song”

alysonmance — Fri, 18 Mar 2011 22:25:56 +0000

i totally get it, Guy Who Uploaded This Video. i totally do.

chris bosh = that overly dramatic lady in court

alysonmance — Sat, 26 Feb 2011 00:44:19 +0000

really though, chris?

“oh, crap” is right

alysonmance — Wed, 23 Feb 2011 15:40:00 +0000

is denny’s syrup really that good?

alysonmance — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 23:53:19 +0000

if so, i need to go buy a case.

notes from the fine dining establishment that is denny’s in chicopee, massachusetts:

when a couple asks a woman in another booth for a syrup loan, it seemed easier to reply, “bitch, your pancakes look fine to me!” Because what else would you reply to such an obnoxious query?

anyway, shit went down.

pictures like this

alysonmance — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 22:08:03 +0000

are the reason you should use what’s on this baby’s feet.

if you can’t see the error in swathing your kid’s legs in greasy latex condoms, you should prolly go ahead and not get knocked up.

other options: DON’T TAKE A PICTURE OF IT.

everyone makes a kid do ridiculous things from time to time, but like taking naked pictures for a guy that isn’t your husband, it’s probably best you don’t document them.

actually, even if the guy is your husband, you should probably have access to all illicit documentation. divorce happens.

and they’re really cutting planned parenthood funding. smh.

honey badger don’t care, honey badger don’t give a shit.

alysonmance — Thu, 17 Feb 2011 18:39:49 +0000

dear rihanna

alysonmance — Mon, 07 Feb 2011 23:59:36 +0000

welcome to my respect.

because he’s not my dad

alysonmance — Sun, 30 Jan 2011 01:06:44 +0000

i think he’s adorable, not embarrassing.